Family values represent who you are as individuals and the guiding spiritual values that keep you connected to a family unit. Without family values you are wild and irresponsible, doing what you will and want to any and everyone, you will find that it does not work for you and you are often alone and discontent. Peace and contentment comes from God and are achieved by us as mortals through our behaviors. The DeBose/Welch family has traced its lineage back to Jacob DeBose, born the year George Washington became president of the United States of America. We are a gifted family producing generations of preachers and teachers dedicating our lives to the service of mankind.

This is the Debose/Welch Rule Book. It has worked for us for hundreds of years.

 

It is important that each family have a book of rules. We are not street people. We did not get this far by accident. The survival of the family depends on the understanding of the rules of life. The basic rule is to love yourself and know that you are made in the image and likeness of God, and that suggestion perfection. You are also to treat others the way you want to be treated. Be honest, and do not take advantage of others. The universe, in which you live, is like a mirror, it will reflect back to you what it sees. You will always have returned back to you what you send out into the world. There are angels to guide you look for them. You can achieve your highest desire through education, and you can destroy your life through bad relationships, bad choices and substance abuse. Stay in God’s “light,” do not go into dark places. If you go into dark places, no one will come in and get you. God gives us “ free will,” you can use it for success or failure Look over these rules from time to time to see if you are on the right track.

 

The family believes in:

God- Family- Education

 

We are the descendants of:

African, European, Cherokee

The places where we have lived are:

Ghana, Scotland/ Ireland North America, Kentucky, South Carolina, St. Augustine Florida, New York City, New Jersey, Georgia,

African Americans have been in this part of the world for at least four hundred years. They have developed methods of survival in a hostile and strange country.

Africans also brought their own value system for human behavior with them. These were rules of behavior established long before the ten commandments of the Bible. Many come from the code of the African King Hammurabi.

Slavery brought another set of rules for survival, and racism and segregation still required the African to develop rules, separate and apart from the traditional society. It would have been impossible for people transported to another culture to have selfish ideas and still be able to endure the shock treatments of the new world. We are a mixed family. We cannot discriminate since we represent a diverse mixture of colors, creeds and nationalities. We are black, white red and brown. The beauty of that mixture makes us an exciting family. Teach your children to accept all people, and to love and support one another.

 

 

 

Basic Rules

Respect your mother and father.

Respect grandparents and members of the extended family

Respect teachers

Boys protect and respect girls

Girls respect and protect boys

Stand up for and protect the innocent and the weak

Do not gossip

Do not make fun of someone who is different

Do not be a bully. Help children who are bullied by others

Always tell the truth

Get an education. Start with religious books, they are useful for language and human value systems.

Education is the doorway out of poverty

School is not there to entertain you or keep you from being bored

School is not supposed to be fun. If you have fun, then good

Go to class, close your mouth, listen and learn.

As you learn, ask questions and participate in activities

Do not drop out of school, hang in there, you need the education

Select one of the Abrahamic faiths to learn (Judaism, Christianity, Muslim)

Respect other religions. Do not talk negatively about other religions

God made all people, and he made them different. Accept people as God made them and their sexual differences.

Do not teach hate

Do not teach racism

Judge a person on their character and not their color

Do not bring disgrace to yourself or your family

Associate with the best and leave the rest.

Do not work in drug programs, or rescue programs. Save yourself and your family. The people with whom you associate will define you.

Help each other

Help the poor

Do not be poor

Do not marry poor people

Treat people with respect, but do not associate with people living in poor neighborhood

Avoid men and women with disturbed family backgrounds

Look for educated people to associate with and mate.

Give people a chance to redeem themselves

Give people a chance to start over

 

Drug Rules

If you use drugs, then drugs are your family. Drugs control of brain, and the brain controls your behavior and your life. No exception

Drug companies pay the best scientist to develop a substance that you cannot refuse or control. You cannot win against the scientist; they know how to control you if you try their products. No one escapes, no one.

If you use drugs, your eyes, your speech and your behavior will tell. People will know you use drugs and avoid you.

Avoid people addicted to substance abuse

Never rescue a drug addict with the hopes of changing them.

If the parent of a potential mate is an addict, then the child will also be an addict. Select another mate

Look for educated people to associate with and mate.

People and law officials can tell if you use drugs. The pupil of the eyes become larger, you have a glassy stare, you speech patterns change, your normal speed patterns change, your skin changes. Anything you put inside of your body will manifest itself on the outside of the body. If you want people to know your business, use drugs.

If you think you can out smart the system, visit a prison system (on line) the only people in prison are smart dumb people. The system makes it possible for you to get drugs, because it makes it possible for it to locate you and keep control over your behavior. Scientist develop the drugs you take, and the government pays them for the blueprints. Once the drug enters your system, you are hooked for life. It enters into the brain, and there is no cure. You think you know someone who kicked the habit, you do not, the desire is always there.

Women who use drugs will eventually produce babies who will be mentally, emotionally and educationally challenged. You make the decision who you are intimate with, but, if you are involved with a person on drugs, avoid passing on the family seeds, use protection. You can avoid embarrassment, remember, drug addicts and emotionally challenged people are not welcomed at family events

 

If you use drugs it is easy for you to be you are known to all public officials.

Drugs put a stamp of identification on you.

Your eye change, the pupils dilate. Your skin changes. You talk fast. You talk a lot

You lie. You think you are smarter than everyone else. You think you can fool people. Drug companies put special substances in their product, which makes it possible to identify users. Anything you put into your system has the power to control you. The purpose of drugs is to keep you out of the work force.

Drug addicts usually lie, and have distorted views of themselves and their lives.

Do not rescue people who play games or take advantage of friends and family members

Help family members in need

Do not support drug or anti social behavior of family members. If you commit a moral illegal act against a family member, your name will be wiped off the family record, and your memory will not be carried into history. We carry our family members with us, and talk about them at family gatherings. We tell their stories to our young. We bless them, and we celebrate that they are our ancestors. Our rules are hard, but we are strong.

 

Family Gatherings

 

Plan picnics, social parties, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Birthday or special occasions to get together and serve plenty of food. Weddings, Birth celebrations, funerals, and serious illness, are must family attendance.

 

Family gatherings are important. It is a way for cousins to get together and see how each is doing

 

Do not bring into the family anyone who will harm the family

Blood first, when there is a question, always support your bloodline

Do not include members of the bloodline at family gatherings if they have done something to hurt members of the family

Do not fight at family gatherings. People, who over use alcohol, may lose control during family gatherings.

Food is important during family gatherings

Each person should prepare or purchase something to bring to family gatherings.

 

Care of Children.

 

Pay careful attention to the younger members, especially the children in the family.

Never be cruel to children

Never abuse children, it is a curse, and will come back and punish you.

Help children in school

Help children to see and understand the joy of life and living

Teach children about God

Make holidays, birthdays, and religious days special for children.

Religion

 

 

There are many paths to faith, and God is the God of all faiths.

Our family is interdenominational. We represent the three major religions of Abraham, Jewish, Christian and Muslim. We are Catholic, Protestant, Jewish and Muslim. Our family religion, in this country is Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian, Episcopalian, Catholic. We have had a long tradition of Methodist ministers going back through slavery.

 

Gossip

 

Put a guard on your mouth. The mouth is a weapon.

Do not gossip, a dog that brings a bone, will take a bone. If you talk about people in the family, they will talk about you. Take trash outside; do not bring your trash into the family

Help members of the family who are confused to understand the rules.

 

Responsibility of Male Members

 

The father, is the God head of the family

 

              Male members should watch out for the care of women and children in the family.

Male members should join together to help each other, and also to support female members of the family.

Spouses of female members should not be able to abuse female members of the family.

Male members of the family should visit female members of the family at least once a year, and present a supportive presence to the female.

               Male members of the family should make phone calls at least three times a year to determine the health and emotional state of female members.

               Male member should make it clear that females are only on loan to other families. If at anytime the spouse of a female member mistreat the female, she can be returned to the protection of the family.

Husbands do not have rights to abuse female members of the families. If abuse is determined, then a family intervention is held, and the male member doing the abuse, is helped to understand, in clear language, that the male members of the family will stand in the place of the female. The female does not have the right to the abuse, even if she permits it. The males will stand in her place, all of the males at the same time.

Females sometimes mate and marry individuals who may have behavior adjustment challenges

Female members of the family should try not to be attracted to the “bad boy.”

Male members should try not to be attracted to “bad girls.”

Present potential mates to the “family”

Family members should ask question on the person’s background. Look for educated people to associate with and mate. Intelligent people have intelligent children. If you do not select someone with a positive background, then use birth protections. Every life you bring into the world will be part of you for life. Careless sex is expensive. Do not ride the poverty train more than once. Get off as soon as you can, and select a different method of transportation. If you commit a felony, you make your life difficult. There are positions in life you cannot hold with a felony conviction. You can still make it, but your life will be harder, and you will have to start over in life. Life does not owe you a living. You owe life your best contribution. Do not blame other people for your problems. Life happens, you are still in charge.

 

The Role of Women

First of all, never get up into a man’s face when you are angry or he is angry. If you are planning to have a conversation with your mate or your husband, do not do the finger waving, hand in the face, back poked out and head rolling stance taken by some black women when talking in a combative way to some other black woman. Loud, offensive in your face talking has been responsible for more women getting punched in the mouth and landing their men in jail, which was not their intent. Usually small women engage in this behavior and usually with a big dog. Most big dogs ignore small high pitched barking dogs, but occasionally the small dog gets bitten. If you have to have a heated conversation with your husband, keep your arms by your side and maintain a distance of at least six feet between you and your husband. Swinging arms set off a danger defend from attack response in men. You do not want the brain in the attack mode but rather the listening mode. You do not have the right to free speech, you have the right to responsible speech. More women with big violent mouths are responsible for sending black men to prison than our racist society. Kool it, and remember you get more with honey than vinegar. If you have a vinegar personality work on it, you do not want to be the Greek tragedy root in your family.

 

The women are the heart and wisdom of the family and have the responsibility of caring for men. Black men respond to their mothers and consider them the source of their strength. Males must be mothered, they must at some point in their lives become “momma boys.” Males who do not become “momma boys” can end up in the penal system. It is the role of the women, to keep the males out of the penal system. Males cannot see danger, they do not like rules or being told what to do. They do not know how to protect themselves from the traps set by society. Males will follow the pack, and fall off a cliff, it is up to the female to let them know about the edge, and the areas of danger.

The new system of slavery is the penal system. The system send out teams of people to capture and bring in new people, and these people are branded for life. The penal system supplies an underground employment, slave labor, human resources population for organized crime, and the various underground activities operated by a powerful control syndicate. Individuals can be trapped in this system for life, and will also produce children who will be the new members of the system. It is very difficult, almost impossible to get out of the underground system. Women have the role and responsibility of keeping their male children out of the system. She will move to neighborhood where there are no hunting parties. If she does not have a mate to help her, she can place the male in a parochial school, which should provide some protection for males.

If the female provides the love and support the male needs, then he will not leave home and join a group of other males, who will be captured. The female must give up any and all relationship, which discourages the commitment to the male child. Sometimes this may be the father, but often it is another male who sees the male child as a threat, and forces the female to give up the male child to the streets. The female, after giving birth to a male child, should not enter into any relationship with anyone or anything that prevent them from their prime responsibility, and that is to care for the male until he reaches the age and period of accountability. This time varies with different individuals, it however, does not happen until the third decade of the males life; this maybe earlier, or it may be later, the responsibility remains the same. Some mothers are lucky if the males enter into relationships with other females who are willing to act as invisible and silent guides for them. These women, usually “momma wives” are able to guide and support these men to reach their highest potentials. All great men in history have “momma wives” or were “momma boys.”

Join the Armed Service

We have had a member of the family serving in the Armed Service since the Revolutionary War in 1776.

Give at least two years of service to the country. The service builds character.

The service will also help you to get out of poverty

The service will also help you to get away from negative situations and people.

People and relationships are responsible for the choices you make. The choices you make will lead you to poverty or wealth.

There is cause and effect. You are responsible for your own life. People can throw their garbage in your direction, but you do not have to accept it as your own. You can avoid family members with negative social behaviors. Pray for them, and leave them alone.

Do not serve excessive alcohol during family gatherings.

Pay attention to the environment

Pay attention to the people in the environment

Treat people the way you want to be treated

Do not steal

Do not take other people’s property

Do not mate with blood relatives

Do not select relatives for mates

Women are the nearest source to God

Respect women

Take care of wives

Take care of children

Take care of husbands.

Watch girl children around all male relatives

Watch boys around male relatives who are violent or angry

Develop a personal relationship with God

Work Ethics

             America is a society of workers, working gives power over your life. Making your own money regardless how small or large it is the first step in becoming the captain of your own ship. Do not be afraid or too proud to scrub or sweep floors to earn a honest living. Do not be afraid or too proud to work two or three jobs in the process of maintaining your self worth.

If you have to live with a relative temporarily, pay your own way, contribute to the operation of the home in which you live financially and managerially. Clean up behind yourself, if you only have a corner, make it the cleanest corner in the house. If they refuse to take the money, put the money on the table and help the family member to know this is important to you. Take any honest job offered to you, show up on time and do not drink or remove anything from the job.        

All businesses have systems of observing all employees, and you are who you are when no one is looking. Become the same trust worthy person regardless of who is watching. Give an honest day’s work for an honest days work. Do not permit mid day to catch you in the bed if you are not working. Spend your days either looking for work or working. A person who is honest and dependable will always find a job. Protect yourself, do not start or take any trouble Earn respect through dependability and honesty. If you have to take a low paying job to make ends meet, it is not the time to demonstrate your intellectual ability. Low paying workers resent any indication of “smartness” or differences.

Make no comment about the job and display an appreciation for the opportunity to work. Do not expect other family members to take care of you, and do not hold grand ideas of working for yourself when you cannot pay your own rent. If you drink or use drugs it will show on your face and in your personality, any chemical will alter physical appearance and behavior. You will not nice the change in behavior, but an employer and co- workers will. Associate with the best and leave the rest. Do not rescue people. Poverty is warm, friendly and supportive. The hardest thing you will do is to leave the comfort and support of good warm friends who are going nowhere. Associate with people who are where you want to go. It is better to be a role model than to be the glue that holds a group of troubled people together

 

 

Career Rules

Stay in school

Sit down, shut up, listen and learn.

You may be smart, but without a teacher and an education, no one will know how smart you are.

Teachers work for the government, so do not cause problems. Few students really like school, but education is the doorway out of poverty

Without an education you will be poor

Without an education you will not attract the best mates

Without an education you will not attract the best job.

Education and school teaches you how to do things you may not want to do.

Education teaches you how to fit into society

Education teaches you how to make the best choices in relationships and life.

Common sense is important. Common sense is an internal feeling about what is right and what is wrong.

Common sense teaches you cause and effect.

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

After age sixteen, the choice to drop out of school is yours. You have the right to be dumb and ruin your life.

Make yourself stay in school.

Do not make life difficult for teachers because you are angry about staying in school.

Only idiots select drug dealing as a career. It does not matter how much money you make in illegal activity, you are still considered low class, and not welcomed at family events.

Money does not make a person. Character and class defines a person

Class is a set of behaviors and respect.

Basic education consists of a High School Diploma and at least two years of college.

Desirable education consists of a High School Diploma and a four years degree

College graduates make more money than non-college graduates.

A college education will make you intelligent. It will help you to organize your thoughts and prepare you for the world of employment.

Most jobs will not hire you if you do not have a basic education or a desirable education.

When you get a job, sit down, shut up, listen and learn.

Do not take anything that belongs to the company. All jobs have hidden cameras, and people to observe your behavior. A camera is always hidden and recording.

Be on time, and do not take too many days off.

Do not have family or friends call you on your job, except in an emergency.

Give your best service to customers. Do not give your opinion.

If you cause trouble, or fight with co-workers, you will be considered a misfit and fired, so try to get along with people.

If respect is important to you, study to become a professional, you will get respect.

Associate with the best, and leave the rest. You are judge by the people with whom you associate.

Service to others

 

A selected part of your life is to be devoted to serving others. Help a neighbor. Teach Sunday school. Work in a camp. Work in an after school center. Work in church. Help senior citizens. Help young children. Be kind to animals. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Love God and take care of the environment and His world.

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