Love is not suppose to hurt. Love does not require the sacrifice of another individual to prove itself. Take no substance or individual into your system, which requires total control submission and obedience to provide a feeling of worth or value. See the God within, and work from the knowledge and strength of that God to know that as made in the likeness of His/Her image, you are complete as you are. Others cannot fill holes of emptiness inside, those are places reserved for God. Fill up the reserved spaces with and for God, and you will have the strength to avoid toxic drugs, behaviors and people. Any relationship requiring you to give up family, children, friends and spiritual beliefs should be considered warning signals of danger, stay away before the passions control your being.

Chinua Achube, the famed African writer discusses how men selected mates. He suggested that an overly passionate relationship with an individual would not be indications of a suitable marriage candidate. He suggested that some responsibilities involved in marriage would be difficult if the individual was controlled by intense  romantic emotions. At first reading it was difficult to understand, but years and maturity provides a better understanding of the principle he was trying to make. Women should not love so deeply that they sacrifice their responsibilities of the care and safety of their children and their own lives. Men should not be entrapped in an emotional relationship reaching the need level, such intense relationship may cause them to forget who they are and other responsibilities required in life. Men and women should never let situations and people in life over whelm them in any circumstances. Life is challenging and certain individuals can make and be responsible for many challenges. There are relationship that can rob spirit and act like an addictive drug demanding total dependence. These are dangerous relationships, and if you feel you are drawn to individuals who may tend to have that power over you, back away as slowly as you can and seek less emotionally stimulating relationships.

Achube speaks of this when one of the characters in his story is not permitted by the Tribe to marry the love of his life and passion, suggesting it would not be a good or healthy marriage. If in life you find yourself emotionally or psychologically overwhelmed, ask yourself who or what have you surrendered your God given power? Depression often comes when expectations are not being realized, and the individual surrenders to the power of some individual or event not able to satisfy their need. If you are needy, ask yourself why, why have you given your power and identy over to that need.

The people and events that bring out the strength in you may not be the most attractive or the more popular, the strength to avoid the dangers of passion submission is determined by your ability to walk away from the wanted. Turn the eyes in another direction and give your focus and attention to what is not obvious.

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